It's been a while

So, I know it's been a while, but I became real depressed and didn't feel like spreading that around so I stayed away. I have recently been back off work because of the ankle. The issue that I am having is that it happened to cause problems right after my year in.

I have been back to work as an optician and went full time around this time last year. I love the doctors I work for, they are amazing, and I don't want to let them down. They hired me knowing about my problems and still gave me the chance. They soon seen my passion for my work and rewarded it. This is the first place that ever did that. So I am nervous. This is the type of job I have been looking for. It has a ceiling on money, but it felt like home. If I have to limp away I am going to be pissed! If I am rewarded my disability then I can cut my hours but still work and then work from home too,.....I have found something good,....(see the link below). All while still having more time with Seth, and being able to have energy for the everyday stuff. We'll see.

After PT this morning and an evening dental appointment, this gal has had enough pain for one day!





http://ipasgiveaway.com/?id=41503&tid=BLGR

At The Hospital

Ahhhh, so finally a small break in the weather and look what your eyes got to feast on. The exploding feeling in my leg that has plagued me all week has finally died down with the humidity. I am finding that there are different pains that come with the different weather patterns. I do not like that. Constant change is not a favorite of mine because it has shadowed my life on so many things. I get but small breaks in between each major change and the rebuild process that follows. I figure this is the same for most and it is normal. This change shows that when the humidity is bad my leg feels like it is swelling from the bone and pushes through all the tendons and muscles and tissues through to the skin and when it reaches the skin it is stopped. It builds but doesn’t push through, and only looks slightly swelled from the outside. On the outside is feels ice cold to the touch. When the humidity comes down it returns and isolates to the bone. This is a more focused pain and they are sharper and more like the lighting bolt feeling. Those are the ones that take your breath away but are easier to breathe through. A very large contradiction, but it is what it is. From what I have been told throughout this whole ordeal is that everything depended on how the bone and joint were set after the accident happened. However in my case all that was done “beautifully” and the bone set so well that even on x-rays you can barely see the fracture, which brings me back to the story.

When we got to the hospital it was just your normal procedures and policies getting information and asking questions and having x-rays and pumping pain medications. The people at the hospital were very nice and seemed to be on top of their game. I did not have to wait long before having the x-rays done and being told that I had a fractured Tibia. Now I have always been told that having a bone fractured was worse then having it broke. It weakens the bone and leaves it more susceptible to breaking down the road. So I figured I was screwed right from the get-go. They gave me the option of staying and having an MRI done there or going home and having it done at home. Well, at that point all I wanted was to be somewhere familiar and comfortable, and I do not feel that in a hospital. So they started the release process. They set my leg from the knee down. The guy doing the set had to push on the bottom of my foot to set it properly and that sucked horribly. The pain almost put me out. Once it was set they gave me prescriptions, had me sign some papers and sent me on my way. My ex wheeled us out of the hospital one at a time after stopping to eat in the cafeteria. I called my insurance company as soon as I got outside of the hospital and tried to make a claim, but their computers were down and I would have to try again the next day. We had to wait for my ex's cousin to come back and get us. He went with the van on the flat bed back home and was going to drive back down to get us. When he did arrive it did not feel like long until we were back in our area. I asked to stop and get my prescriptions filled since I knew it would probably be at least a half an hour before I would have them in hand, which we did, and then my ex drove to my house to drop me off so he could take his cousin and his wife back to their car so they could drive another hour back to their area. My ex said it would only take a few to drop them off and then he would be back with my pain medications.

By the time my ex got back from dropping them off two hours had past. I was going in and out from the pain and was pissed. I couldn't go to the bathroom without help, couldn't get up at all without help at that point and I had never felt so helpless in my life. I still felt the drugs in my system, they just weren't working on what they were supposed to be working on. They were simply making me stupid and too weak to move. The pills I was taking my body usually rejected anyway, so I didn't know what was going on in my body. So began my relationship with the doctors.